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1.05.2015

Let's get personal

I'm currently alone sitting in a really cute coffee shop, mocha espresso in hand, blogging, and to top it all off the weather is perfect. How hipster is that...but you know what? I'm actually thoroughly enjoying it, regardless of the judgment that may proceed. :p This is an outlet for me.



This will probably be an unnecessarily long post of me rambling, not making sense, or maybe even get super deep..who knows. The past few months have sucked, but I chose to smile. I've watched my mom been hospitalized, I've had my own share of doctor's visits and tests, I've been bogged down with the stress of not being good enough school,well knowing I can do better, I've watched and maybe even let my most treasured friendship deteriorate. I've tried to fight for the relationships with friends that I treasured. As you can imagine, this may or may not be a lot for one 20 year old girl to handle, depends on what you've gone through. No one really knows or knew what all I was going through, or even if they did I knew how to hide it but I was overwhelmed. This post isn't going to be me complaining, it isn't going to be a "have pity on Alex" post, it's going to be "how I got through it" one. All of the burdens I endured weren't all at once, they kind of staggered and accumulated as the past almost 6 months went on. I may have felt overwhelmed, upset, discouraged but I refused to let my circumstances show, I refused to let the events I went through define me. I think they way you perceive things and how you define yourself all depends on that exactly, how you define yourself. One morning I just woke up and that was it, I realized something. Emotions are normal, they are healthy. Being upset, overwhelmed, and sad just shows us we are human and we care. You may sad, bored, overwhelmed or any negative adjective you can use to describe yourself or someone else may call you definitely will have an affect on you but if you start to believe that then I believe that's what you'll become. I could have gone into depression, I could have been so reclusive to the point where I pushed the people I cared about away, but maybe I'm too hopeful, naive, innocent minded. If you realize that you can only be the best you and that there is always light, even if a glimmer that there is always hope. The moments you're happy, laughing, genuine are the moments that define you-not the moments that tear you down or upset you. You know what, that's going to be my theme for blogging for all of my sections..Be the best you. The real you.